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Friday, December 19, 2008

Went home early as Ian is still not feeling too good. Finally set my hands on getting him well...I left him in the hands of my FIL and husband and after 4 days the fever was still there.

I sponged him. Forced him to eat a tiny bowl of porridge, a tiny bit of bread...etc...but his fever broke eventually. He sweat! Yes...he did! It's a joy to see him sweat. 4 days of fever and on none of the days he sweat. Anyway, at 2.30am, we tested his temperature, it was down. This morning too, it was down. Before I left the house, he drank 1/4 cup of warm milk. He is having his bronchitis cough again. Now I wonder how to cure that. I have no problems with fever cos all he needed was food and to sleep and some sponging.

He is my son...I know what to do with him. Although I know they didn't like the way I handled it. My FIL, MIL and hubby to soft on him regards to him eating. If he don't eat...okay....to me, that's not OK. Without food, he cannot cure and he is lethargic. *duh..logic isn't it?

Anyway, I think Ion is fine. All he complain was tummy pain (cos all the air) and of course, abit of fever. But then again, he was running all about. So he is very much in a better condition that Ian. All Ian wanted was to lie down.

Will try to go home early to make that little boy eat abit more. Even if he crys, I have not much choice. He needs to eat to start running about. Hope for the best.

I had a GOOD day yesterday. I am satisfied in more ways than another. Although my body is aching from sleeping on a thin mattress, I am happy.

Thots of the DAY @
8:21 AM


Sunday, December 14, 2008

I am getting way too lazy to update my blog. Those who are even reading...I think time out. When I feel like updating, I will update. Maybe at this moment, things are still not too bad but still there are times where I feel the wall in front of me can never be broken.

Sometimes I wonder where my heart lies. It's a wonder which will never disappear and will always reappear when I am sub consciously thinking too hard about what a "F**King" life I currently have now.

At this stage of my life, the person that keeps me going is my daughter. I love her to bitz but I just can't take care of her myself. Part of me feel like leaving the rest of the family and just have her only. She is my light and joy. I know she loves me (or more like she loves the chain that I am wearing) sufficiently. She makes me feel "known" and makes me feel that I exist in this world. I try to spend more time with her, carrying her often, playing with her often so that she knows who her mummy is. My maid (knowing that she is trying to get into my good books) is trying to get her to know mummy more. I want my daughter to be more stucky to me that my sons. My sons is already a "goner" and it's hard to get them on my side...ever. Whatever I do for them...most of the time...R takes the credit and he doesn't let the kids know that it's my idea. So whatever fault happens, it's always mine. So now everything is...go ask ur daddy! That's the easiest solution to everything.

Recently I have been eating alot. Have already started to spout that TUMMY again. Too lazy to tone it up. Need to exercise but man...I am one lazy person.

**Updates:
- I ran my 1st 10km SCB Marathon on the 7th Dec 2008. Time 1hr 35 mins
It was enjoyable. Will probably make this an annual event (if I can find kakis) and attend others like great eastern and shape.
- DnD was on friday 12th Dec. Had a waredrob misfunction. Long story
- Ion and Ian had their performance already
- Ian's childcare increase price by $75!
- Performance appraisal is here. I hope my boss will do a fair one (I think I did fairly okay better than expected but not fantastic though)
- Ilyse loves to see me!
- Have started tutoring again..need the cash ASAP (getting broke)
- Desperately wish to buy a car but the cost is extremely difficult for my own self to justify

Thots of the DAY @
12:20 AM


Thursday, December 4, 2008

It's our anniversary today however, I do not feel anywhere excited or happy. No plans today cos cutting cost so I suggested to go for Japanese buffet next Wed instead (cos Wed is cheaper - ladies nite).

Bought 2 shoes, 1 track shoe and 1 nice black shoes. Courtesy of R (i.e. he paid). Total cost is around less than $83? Not bad of a deal. He got a PSP in return.

Time has flown rather quickly. I am almost 3 months back in my current company. Ilyse is turning 8 mths this month. She is my joy and happiness though I dun spend much time with her. Her little funny movements makes me happy. So is such a sweet "little" (technically she isn't very little) thing. Her smiles makes everyone smile...make everyone forget their troubles.

I feel so troubled with life, sometimes I just dun know what is F**king wrong with it. It's just wrong. Maybe marriage wasn't a good thing for me. I really feel I am not the kind of person suitable for marriage. I feel disappointed with myself that I ain't a good parent or sometimes a good wife. Dun think I can handle my own household. Should I just live life simply...dun bother about buying shares or whatever. Just be lazy?

Got to think about that.

The SCB run is on Sunday. Wish me luck!

Thots of the DAY @
8:11 AM


Jay's philsophy

Each of us are brought to this world for some reason, though now most of us have yet to figure out what it can be! Some of us have tough challenges (more bad times), just think of it that the person "up there" is thinking highly of you. Just remember good times will always come after bad times. That's how I try to keep sane.

The One & ONLI

Jay's profile

Location: Singapore
Age: Unknown



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