Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Updates:- Officially shifted out of Kovan (date 11th Oct 2008)- Currently staying in Braddell- Love working with my current boss...she is good in both aspect of work and person- I signed up for the SCB run (only god knows how I am going to end up running)- Got Bird Park pass for us for Xmas! (Horray)- Still debating on booking for holiday to Macau (still got 1 more week to think abt it)- Debating whether to bring kids to genting. But to think of spending that $500. Might as well stay in Singapore and have good meals instead- Been overspending. My targetted yr-end savings...is going to be a miss- Life isn't great but okay.- Been overeating...getting fatter- Fallen in love with the wine "Cockburns Special Reserve Port" cheap and strong (20% alcohol)- No internet access at home *sobz*- Hmm...what else?
Thots of the DAY @
3:42 PM
Monday, October 6, 2008
Okay, having read the above, does it make sense?Well, it does make alot of sense and I think it's true. Marriage is hard work. However, my main arguement is that it takes 2 to clap. It's pointless to keep asking this question on whether you married the right person or not because alot depends on individual. Let's say in a marriage, there is 1 person who is working hard to keep the relationship together but the other half doesn't appreciate or doesn't bother...will the marriage fail? Obviously it will, right? Hence the topic of "Did I marry the right person?" does not make sense. Alot of times people think that it's each other fault that marriage fails. Undoubtly, it is partially true. As times goes by, we seem to dislike things about each other. Then we wonder why we even got married in the first place. The more we think about things, the worse things seem to be. Human's are greedy in nature...it's never easy to satisfy that the needs of oneself. Another tot. If a person was to have an affair, will there be any happiness? I seriously doubt it as I think more problems will occur..more worries...more lies...more unhappiness...esp if the other new party can't be bothered with you too. Is it another heartaching experience? I think so. The only time the person will be happy is ONLY if the other person is WITH the person and when he/she isn't with the person...unhappiness occur. Hmmm....sounds like a marriage problem. Hahaha.
Thots of the DAY @
4:03 PM
I actually typed a whole lot of stuff but somehow my connection got broken when I posted and the whole lot of stuff went MIA. *sigh*. Whatever I typed wasn't meant to be on this blog I guess.This is something someone sent to me. I read this before and I am not too sure if I posted this. But no harm reading it again. See if you see any sense or meaning to this.DID I MARRY THE RIGHT PERSON? During one of our seminars, a woman asked a commonquestion. She said, 'How do I know if I married the right person?' I noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so I said, 'It depends. Is that your husband?' In all seriousness, she answered 'How do> you know?' Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it's weighing on your mind. Here's the answer: EVERY relationship has a cycle. In the beginning, you fell in love with your spouse/partner. You anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and liked their idiosyncrasies (unconventional behavior/habit). Falling in love with your spouse wasn't hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's> called 'falling' in love. Because it's happening TO YOU . People in love sometimes say, 'I was swept of my feet.' Think about the imagery of that __expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something came along and happened TO YOU . Falling in love is easy . It's a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few years of marriage, the euphoria (excitement) of love fades. It's the natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts. The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship, but if you think about your marriage, you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage. At this point, you and/or your spouse might start asking, 'Did I marry the right person?' And as you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when marriages breakdown. People blame their spouse for their unhappiness and look outside their marriage for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes. Infidelity is the most obvious. But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, a friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances. But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your marriage. It lies within it. I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a few years later. Because (listen carefully to this): THE KEY TO SUCCEEDING IN MARRIAGE IS NOT FINDING THE RIGHT PERSON; IT'S LEARNING TO LOVE THE PERSON YOU FOUND. SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. It'll NEVER just happen to you. You can't 'find' LASTING love. You have to 'make' it day in and day out. That's why we have the "__" expression 'the labor of love.' Because it takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it takes WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make your marriage work. Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do(with or without your spouse) to succeed with your marriage. Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as> gravity), there are also laws for relationships. Just as the right diet and exercise program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It's a direct cause and effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable. you can 'make' love. Love in marriage is indeed a 'decision'. Not just a feeling.Remember this always: 'God determines who walks into your life. It is up to you to decide who you let walk away, who you let stay, and>who you refuse to let go.'
Thots of the DAY @
3:52 PM
